Surviving The Distance
STORY BY: ASHLEY OLMEDO
Regardless of our circumstances I wouldn’t change anything about our situation. Being in a long distance relationship is challenging yet extremely rewarding at the same time. Just like any relationship, mine will be different from many long distance relationships out there but this is how my boyfriend and I make our relationship work from over a thousand miles away.
Staying positive is one of the most important things. We don’t see each other for 3 months so keeping a positive mindset is important in maintaining a healthy relationship. Trust is also really important, we’re literally across the country from one another so if our relationship lacked trust then it wouldn’t work.
Communicate, communicate, communicate! We try to stay in contact throughout the day but we also understand that we’re both busy with classes and other daily activities so there’s nothing wrong with going hours without talking. We’re usually pretty good with this and talk basically everyday even if it’s a couple texts here and there. But thank god for FaceTime! We try to FaceTime a couple times a week which really helps.
Living separate lives is time consuming but we try to remind each other how much we care and love one another, which may seem like something small but trust me it makes all the difference. We’re a private couple so we don’t like posting our business on social media we rather express our appreciation for one another through text, Facetime or when we see each other.
Another important thing is keeping each other relevant, we tell each other about our daily lives as well as ask about each others opinions and anything exciting that’s come up within our life. We always support each other no matter what it is, we’re literally each other's cheerleaders. There’s no one else that supports me more than Rudy does. I could literally tell him the most ridiculous goal and he’ll believe in me 100%.
One aspect of our relationship that has really gotten us through the rough long distance patch is our humor. We’re both goof balls, we crack jokes and laugh through the tough times and it’s really helped when balancing the strain of a long distance relationship.
Here’s a list of what I think makes a long distance relationship work versus what Rudy thinks it takes…
We may miss anniversaries, birthdays, new experiences and have limited time together in between school breaks but we’ve noticed many positive changes within our relationship. We’ve matured so much within the past year. Although we don’t fight often, we have learned to get over petty arguments by laughing them off or giving each other time to cool down and talk it through. Being apart has also made us value our time together 1,000 times more.
Through our long distance relationship we’ve learned to be independent, it’s okay to spend time alone and do things on your own. When your significant other is across the country you don't’ have much of a choice. Going out with your girls or spending time with the boys becomes the regular and slightly eases the vacant spot of your significant other. We’ve also learned to become our own person, we don’t fully depend on each other and instead of being a necessity we’re a luxury to one another.
We’re far from perfect, we argue over silly things, we misunderstand each other but we never let the strain of missing one another get the best of us. We push through the long months until we see each other again. We count down the days and become anxious as the last days apart come to a close. Four years strong and I still get butterflies when I see him and to me that makes every second apart worth it.